


Honey, I'm Good, I Found Myself a Cheerleader

by SnowWhiteKnight



Series: Rowdy [2]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Don't hit on Sandor, F/M, Jealousy, One Shot, Or Sansa will hit you, POV Original Character, Sansa's still a badass, Songfic, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-05-31 07:08:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6460669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowWhiteKnight/pseuds/SnowWhiteKnight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a night in a bar, trying to pick a guy up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Honey, I'm Good, I Found Myself a Cheerleader

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place somewhere in the 5 year time gap between the last two chapters of Let's Get A Little Bit Rowdy. I was driving home from a friends house, and these two songs came up on my playlist (in this order) and this is what came to mind, more or less. It was an hour long drive... Anyway...hope you like it. :)

Honey stared at the man at the bar. He was huge, muscular, tattooed and just her type. Bonus, she could see in the mirror behind the bar that he was scarred on half his face. That meant he was more than likely starved for affection and would more willing to give her what she wanted, a good fucking and maybe some cash. Gods, he was built. She could even ignore the scars for a body like that. She could ask him to fuck her doggy-style or close her eyes. For a body like that, there were options.

She adjusted her breasts in the push up bra she was wearing under the tight t-shirt. Her leather pants and jacket provided a nice contrast to the white of her graphic tee. Her golden blonde tresses were voluminous, pulled back and held in place by a  _ lot _ of hairspray. She looked like one badass chick. Slutty, but not whorish. Very fuckable. Perfect. She waited until the shorter man with him went off with a petite brunette to play pool. She dabbed her lips with some gloss and sauntered up to him, staying on his good side. He gave her a side glance, but kept his concentration on the large tv screen that was next to the mirror. Some fight was on, one of those extreme martial arts things.

The bartender came up and asked, “What can I get ya, hon?”

“Whiskey, neat.” Men tended to like it when women ordered whiskey. She actually hated the stuff, but it never took long for a man to offer to buy her something else. The woman looked her up and down like she knew that wasn’t her preferred drink, shrugged her shoulders and poured her two fingers of the golden brown liquid. After the bartender took her money and left to take care of someone further down, Honey turned to the big man. “Hi there.”

He glanced at her. “‘Lo,” he said, then turned back to the tv. She felt a slight twitch in her cheek. So he was shy? Or he was so unused to attention from a pretty woman like herself, that he wasn’t sure what to do. Yes, that was likely.

“Aren’t you going to ask what nice girl like me is doing in a place like this?” she asked sweetly, raising her glass to her lips.

“Don’t particularly care, so no.”

She nearly spit out the whiskey. He must  _ really  _ not be used to attention from a woman. Possibly gay? No, he was definitely straight. He was ogling a redhead in the defense class commercial that was currently on the tv. She could see the beginnings of an erection from where she stood. “Oh. Well, my name is  _Honey_ and I’ll be happy to tell you, in private. You got somewhere we can go?” She placed her hand on his bicep and squeezed gently. “I can help you with that tent in your pants,” she whispered seductively, pressing her breasts into him.

“Nah, Honey, I’m good. I’ve got somebody at home.”

She clenched her free hand into a fist. Stubborn, odious man! Just say yes already. No one said no to Honey. No one.

“We could go to a hotel…”

He sighed. “Look, you seem nice enough, and I’m sure you’ll make someone’s night, but it won’t be mine. By ‘someone’, I mean, my girlfriend. Well, fiancee, actually. She’s already got all of my love, so thanks but no thanks.” His phone buzzed with a text message. “In fact, you might want to step back, because she’s on her way here and she’s quite the jealous type. Once threatened to dislocate both of a woman’s arms for feeling me up.” She was a little dumbfounded, but then figured he must be really shy and was lying about it to save himself some embarrassment. Like anyone would put up with a horrid face like that for long. She decided to change tactics.

“Don’t you think I’m pretty?” she asked, batting her eyes a little and giving him a slight pout.

“Yes, you’re very pretty. A solid nine,” he said, rubbing his eyes as if he were tired.

“Don’t I make you feel like cheating? Cheat sex is hot,” she said, biting her lower lip in a way that tended to drive men crazy. “I’m really good at keeping secrets.”

He looked at her like she was a moron. “No, not really, sorry. She’s pretty much the best thing to ever happen to me. She’s my cheerleader, always right there when I need her, which means she’ll be here any second now.”

“Am I not prettier than your ‘girlfriend’?” she said, pouting even more. One guy had told her she was irresistible when she pouted.

He snorted. “You’re a nine. She’s an eleven. You do the math.” He took a swig from his beer and turned back to the tv. He took a look at the door when the bell jingled and a woman walked in. He smiled, his scars twisting even more horribly. The woman who had just entered was insanely beautiful and tall, dressed in a peasant top and flowy skirt, but she didn’t look like she could fight a cupcake, let alone Honey.

She turned back to the awful man, her pout turned into a sneer. “Must be a blind eleven to put up with your ugly face,” she snarled.

He looked at her again, raising an eyebrow. “Bump that down to a six. You’re fugly when you’re mad.”

She raised her arm to punch him. “You sonofa--hrk!” Honey went flying backwards. She found herself on the floor, her throat under the foot of the redheaded cupcake woman.

“I’m sorry, I have zero tolerance for someone insulting my man and then attempting to assault him. Sandor has a tendency of being blunt to the point of idiocy, so I apologize for his stinging remark, but you did start it. Would you like to rephrase your retort or shall I squash you right here?” Honey tried to push the woman's foot away, but the cupcake wouldn’t budge. “Well?”

Honey pushed back the awful feeling in her gut. She hated to admit when she was wrong, but she liked breathing even more. “I apologize for my rudeness, sir and lady.”

“He’s not a sir,” the woman said coolly. “And I’m no lady.” She could have fooled Honey. The woman was graceful even when pinning someone to the floor with her foot. “But we accept your apology.” She removed her foot from Honey’s throat. She looked at someone behind the bar, probably the raven haired bartender. “Sorry, Mya, I know Lothor doesn’t like it when I fight in here, but she was asking for it.”

“It’s fine, Sansa. I was getting ready to toss her out anyway. Harassing a regular is not allowed, miss.” She saw the bartender poke her head over the bar to look at the woman on the floor. Honey bit back a scathing reply.

She got to her feet with little trouble and stared at the redhead. She was the woman in the self-defense commercial. She still looked really familiar, though Honey couldn’t place her. Without a word, she grabbed her whiskey, downed it in one gulp, and stalked out of the bar. She was nearly home when she spied an old poster plastered on the side of a building, advertising a local mixed martial arts tournament. Her eyes went wide as she realized where she had seen that woman before. Alayne Stone, famed fighter and all around badass, was staring back at her.

**********

“I can’t leave you alone for a minute, can I?” Sansa said with a grin before kissing him hello.

He shrugged. “When you’re a sexy beast, it’s only natural that you attract women of all sorts. Usually nutters though.”

“Is that so?” she asked with a grin. “Does that make me a nutter?”

“Oh, you’re the nuttiest of them all. You said yes to marrying me. Completely mental, you are.” She shoved him slightly, but they both laughed and turned their attention to the tv. Bronn and Margaery had joined them as well to watch Robb’s first official match at UFC 190.

 

**Author's Note:**

> [Honey, I'm Good](https://youtu.be/Go7gn6dugu0), I Found Myself A [Cheerleader](https://youtu.be/jGflUbPQfW8)


End file.
